Saturday, August 15, 2009

Ugh...

So since starting my job, I've been unable to eat more than one small meal and because of that I'm losing weight. I'm not sorry, except that by about 2pm I'm VERY tired and honestly feeling rather dizzy. It's amazing how week I've gotten as I've gotten older. The young me would have been able to take this in a stride.

I say I'm not sorry, but also, I'm not trying to do this on purpose. I just have so much on my mind and when we have lunch at school, by the time I get the kids to the cafe and I get back to class, I only have a bout 5 minutes to eat. It's not possible to eat a meal. I'm not complaining too much because I believe I needed to lose a couple of pounds, but I don't want to get sick again.

:(

I just want to feel comfortable again....right now I don't feel comfortable. I feel stressed, out of sorts and otherwise exhausted.

I want to be strong. I want to be healthy. I want to be the good Me again...but how can I when my mind is constantly occupied? I'm sure this is only a phase, so I'm not too worried about it...well, maybe a little.

Please, goddess, help me to stay healthy. Help me to put my health first instead of last. Please help me to eat and nourish my body in a healthy way that will help me accomplish my daily goals without being feebly exhausted.

1 comment:

Angel said...

I just wanted you to know that I'm here. Stress and change affect how I'm eating also. When I'm feeling out of control, I tend to want to severly control my food. The weight issue is hard too, when you feel that you need to lose a few. I'm stuggling with that. We need to keep our energy up for our job and kids. You have worked too hard to get where you are to let this stupid disease control your life. You are so beautiful, and I just love you. Let's keep fighting!